Life is unfair to some...

As a Malay and a good Muslim nonetheless, we are thought to be good, generous, patience and basically be good. It is now the Holy month of Ramadhan. However, i am going to rant a bit today.

I am just frustrated with the current state of my life. I have a programming background and switched to doing sales/business development (but still retain my expertise as a system engineer with a consultant-like job) with a promise of greener pastures (money to support my family). It was going well for about a year and a half before i shift to my current job because of an even greeeeener pastures!! Hah!!!

And now, after 4 years, i have not improve my condition. I worked like a donkey, missed my kids growing up, sleep in the office... but guess what? NO MOOLAH!!!! And the reason you joined BD/Sales is to get more moolah!!!! It is said that there is where all the money are!!!! And for a kick-ass job i'm getting paid pennies!!!!!!! Where is my 20, 30, 90, 100K???

I'm tired, frustrated, miserable because i couldn't fulfill my promise to provide a better life for my family... My wife is being all okay about it and supported me through all the rough time... but until when?

Now my eldest daughter will start kindergarten next year, my MIL will require medical attention in the coming years... if my life isn't improving how can i keep all my promises?

Perhaps it's time to change job?
Perhaps a more desk-bound job?
Perhaps move to project management?

And the best part; "Takpa, nanti Feizal boleh beli kereta BMW utk makcik" (It's OK, Feizal will be able to buy you a BMW) - What a load of BULL!!!!

feeling depressed!